Vive Le Tour! Part 5

Ha ha. I tricked you all. You thought I was off Le Tour but I was just hanging back in the peloton, grimacing as though I was having a rough day, while secretly plotting my big move. (Boy, we'll all be glad when the Tour is over for another year won't we).

17. The names. Like the guy I picked to win. Alejandro Valverde. AL-LEH-HAN-DRO VAL-VAIR-DEY! That's a great name. He even sounds like a winner. Although a guy I know said he sounds like a latin lover. I don't really know much about this Valverde guy, but I love his name. Yeah, this picking winners by name thing explains my great success in wagering on the ponies. But come on...Alejandro Valverde. Is it possible to be in love with a name? Is it possible that was a rhetorical question? Rhetoric. Another cool word. WTF. I think somebody slipped something into my food or drink. Anyway, there are some other cool Tour rider names but I'm gonna have to leave those out because I've decided #17 has to be about VALVERDE. Alejandro.... ah....

18. I miss Robbie McEwen. Yeah, I didn't even know this guy a week and a half ago and now I'm sad he's gone. Here's to you Robbie.

19. The team names. The announcers kind of ruined Cofidis for me. In my mind it sounded really cool but when they say it it just kind of sounds flat. However, Phil (I think) saying Liquigas is pretty funny. It always sounds to me like he's saying Leaky Gas. "The leaky gas team is...." Oh dear. And this really has nothing to do with team names but when the commentators say things like, "ohh, looks like so and so is in a *spot of bother*..." that cracks me up. Here's this guy competing in this crazy ass sporting event and they're going 'oh dear, he's in a spot of bother isn't he? shall we have a nice cuppa then?' Snort.

20. The descents. Holy fuck. Excuse my language but holy fuck. I need some stronger swearing for this. But I'm now remembering some of these Alp descents and I'm having difficulty speaking (you know, speaking through the keyboard). These professional cyclists are crazy ass mutherfuckas. Do you know how fucking fast they go downhill? Very fucking fast, that's how fast. And sometimes they screw up their line and crash. Some of those mountain descents - you go over the side, wow, it's a long way down. A long, long, long, long, long, long long, long way. I can't remember the name of the climb (the Col de something ;) ) but my stomach plummeted just watching them hit the top as the road completely fell away. Wow. Awesome descents. I was scared to death just watching.